Art Machine
Just another former infatuation junkie

I was a comic geek once upon a time.

From the time I was a little kid until almost a decade or so ago (was it really a decade since I was a college sophomore? Yeesh), I was an avid comic collector.

As a kid, I bought pretty much any superhero comic I could get my hands on—particularly anything with Spider-Man, Batman, Captain America, or Superman on the cover.

As a young teenager, I discovered ElfQuest and learned the joys of longform comic storytelling—something I had never quite gotten the hang of with superhero comics. And by the time I was the aforementioned college sophomore, my comics intake consisted pretty much entirely of Strangers in Paradise, Books of Magic, and brief flirtations with Cerebus and Sandman Mystery Theatre, as well as Bone (which I loved, but I got into way too late at the time).

And then it stopped.

All of my friends know I’m a copyright geek. Well, actually, a copyright reform geek. I feel our current copyright laws are ridiculously draconian, and I’m constantly railing against the myth of perpetual copyright and arguing that DRM violates the doctrine of fair use. By the way – do you know the MPAA just said in court that you’re a criminal if you make even one back-up copy of a DVD? According to them, if you pay $19.99 for a movie and the disc gets damaged, your only legal option is to pay $19.99 for a new copy. This despite the long-standing doctrine of Fair Use, and despite the fact that blank media actually carries a few cents’ tax to cover royalties from copyrighted material being copied to them.

In the past few years, I’ve been told I needed to defend the “position” that the works of Bram Stoker, Jules Verne, and Mark Twain are in the public domain by people who wanted to stop somebody from adapting one or the other.

First of all, all of those authors’ works were published prior to 1923, which makes them public domain in the United States. This is because anything printed in the U.S. prior to 1923 is in the public domain.

The original U.S. copyright lasted for a 28-year period, which could be renewed once.

The current copyright law – thanks to Sonny “Look Out For That Tree” Bono – is that copyright lasts for the life of the artist, plus 70 years.

This means that if the copyright of works by Stoker, Verne, and Twain were subject to the Bono Copyright Extension (which, I would like to remind you, they are not), then Stoker’s works would have been in the public domain since 1982, Verne’s since 1975, and Twain’s since 1980.

But they were public domain much, much earlier than that because they were published prior to 1923 and the Bono Copyright Extension never applied to them. The maximum any of these works could have lasted under copyright was 56 years, and most of them probably only remained under copyright for 28 because—as was the case with H.P. Lovecraft’s works—nobody ever thought to renew the copyrights.

Again: However you slice it, these works are in the public domain in the United States. Plain and simple. Close the book, drink a cold glass of water, go to bed.

Then, tonight, I had one of my friends text me while I was waiting to hear a speech.

He said, “I need a simple, easy-to-read source on copyright. Somebody on my project is insisting Poe’s stories are copyrighted.”

Yeah.

Poe died in 1849.

1849!

1849!

Even if the Bono Copyright Extension applied (and it doesn’t), that would mean his work had been in the public domain since 1919.

Copyright hawks and lawsuit-happy professional organizations like the MPAA and RIAA have created a mythology of perpetual copyright, and it is destroying our ability to build on our cultural foundations. Kids today are terrified to build off of Edgar Allen Poe – a man who has been dead for over a century and a half. How long will it be before somebody is insisting that Shakespeare’s work (he died in 1616, for those of you keeping score) can’t possibly be in the public domain?

Every now and then, you wish some people would keep their big mouths shut. Not because what they say is stupid or annoying, but because comprehending their statement would unveil a world of lovecraftian horror whose stygian depths are broken only by the merest hints of the movement of the cthulhoid terrors that inhabit them.

Behold, the non-Euclidean geometry of (D – Nebraska) Sen. Ben Nelson’s mind as he reads what can only be a thank you note to Mutual of Omaha.

Sen. Ben Nelson (D-Neb.) said Friday that he will oppose legislation that would give people the option of a public health insurance plan….

Nelson’s problem, he told CQ, is that the public plan would be too attractive and would hurt the private insurance plans. “At the end of the day, the public plan wins the game,” Nelson said. Including a public option in a health plan, he said, was a “deal breaker.”

Yes. That’s Democratic Senator Ben Nelson of Nebraska stating that he won’t support a public health care option because it would just be too good. Apparently, our government must now be prohibited from actually helping people in need because it’s bad for private industry’s profit margins.

Previous 10 up. Here’s the new 10. If you know the artist and song, post away in the comments.

1. “I’m wired and I’m tired and I’m grinnin’ like a fool.”
2. “One and one make two, two and one make three—it was destiny.”
3. “She never mess with entertainers ‘cause they always leave.”
4. “Thrown like a star in my vast sleep, I open my eyes to take a peep…”
5. “Any jobber got the sack”
6. “The center of the earth is the end of the world – and I could really care less.”
7. “It’s just the beasts under your bed, in your closet and in your head.”
8. “Once I finally find her, I’ll get permission from the wife—”
9. “The burden of pity will show in the people we used to know.”
10. “Maybe you think I look a tramp, or maybe you think I’m round to steal a car.”

Well, maybe not quite popular, but demand. From me. A random 10 – if you know the artist and song, post it in the comments. No Googling allowed.

1. “Midnight blue burning gold. A yellow moon is growing cold.” “Stay” by Reyo Bikkin (Pink Floyd cover)


2. “I won’t be told anymore that I’ve been brought down in this storm” “Madagascar” by Guns ‘n’ Roses


3. “Now all you do is sit and dream of a fay girl green by a mountain stream.” “Teas” by Donovan


4. “Not a single luxury! Like Robinson Crusoe—I watch too much TV….” – “Doin’ Time Under the Lifeguard Stand” by Eddie From Ohio


5. “With your wings, I can learn to fly” “Sweet Young Thing” by The Monkees


6. “Heaven… I’m in Heaven… And my heart beats so that I can hardly speak….” “Cheek to Cheek” by Pat Suzuki (originally by Fred Astaire), guessed by Carl


7. “I could use an angel to guard against the shadows.” “I Could Use a Hero” by Bering Strait


8. “We grow out of the days like a moth-eaten sweater.” “Happily Ever After” by Spin Doctors


9. “You would kill all the sick ones – you would bury them deep in the earth.” “Pretty Pink Ribbon” by Cake


10. “And is her power all in her club sandwich?” “The Waitress” by Tori Amos

I enjoyed Thud’s take on this meme, so I figured, eh, why not?

Using ONLY SONG TITLES from ONE artist, and cleverly answer these questions below. Make sure you send a copy to me when you respond. Do not use the same artist as I did or duplicate song titles.

All of these songs are from The Monkees:

Are you a male or female: Salesman
Describe yourself: (I’m Not Your) Stepping Stone
How do you feel about yourself? Looking For the Good Times
Describe your ex boyfriend/girlfriend: The Girl I Left Behind Me
Describe your current boy/girl situation: This Just Doesn’t Seem To Be My Day
Describe your current location: Pleasant Valley Sunday
Describe where you want to be: I Wanna Be Free
Your best friend: Regional Girl
Your favorite color is: Early Morning Blues and Greens
You know that: Tomorrow’s Gonna Be Another Day
What’s the weather like? Shades of Gray
If your life was a television show what would it be called? Cuddly Toy
What is life to you? Daily, Nightly
What is the best advice you have to give? Laugh
If you could change your name what would it be? Shorty Blackwell

They say that only the good die young. Well, yesterday was my birthday. Where do I fall on the scale?

So far, I am not as good as:

• Ritchie Valens


• Aaliyah


• Buddy Holly


• River Phoenix


• James Dean


• Janis Joplin


• Jimi Hendrix


• Otis Redding


• Brandon Lee


• Kurt Cobain


• Jim Morrison

But I’m apparently right at the age where Hank Williams died. And he died in my home town – go fig.

But I am apparently still a few years better than:

• Andy Gibb


• Jim Croce


• Patsy Cline


• Bruce Lee


• Mama Cass


• Sam Cooke


• Sylvia Plath


• John Belushi


• Chris Farley


• Andy Kaufman


• Jesus

All of whom died within 6 years of my current age.

io9 decided recently to report on the rumor that Christian Bale might be replaced as Batman. Note that they didn’t report the rumor, but reported on the rumor. Big difference.

According to “industry gossip” (which means: lots and lots of papers got excited about something they read, but can’t remember where), Bale may be damaged goods after his on-tape melt down.

That’s mighty funny coming from io9 – a blog that routinely reports its own bloggers’ idle speculation and pipe dreams as “the industry buzz.”

But, see, this is why they can decry the rumor mill – because this particular rumor goes completely against what they want to happen. They either want Bale to remain in the cape and cowl, or for an actor in his 50’s to be cast to play in a direct-from-the-page adaptation of The Dark Knight Returns (a comic I like and respect, but which would make an absolutely horrible movie).

With all their talk about how sexualizing and abusing men makes Battlestar Galactica a feminist series, and their near-constant backhanding of Heroes and all of its remaining fans, io9 is the type of organization that makes me completely understand why Russell T. Davies would make it a policy to ignore what the fandom tells him to do with his work. It’s… it’s like Andy Kaufman decided after his wrestling career that he wanted to start a sci-fi fanzine.

And they remain in my Bloglines… well, frankly, I’m not sure why.

Awwww… Why can’t Kitteh and Roomba be friends?